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What happened after nine months of no strength training?

Well, the photo says it all I believe. That 6 six-pack of desperados is killing me XD. Oké, but now the full story. I started with 9 months of strength training before lockdown after a big time of not doing strength training at all. I did it from 2012 until the end of 2015 and in 2016 I was leaning more and more to boxing. I did this very consciously, because unlike most people; you need to get me out of the gym and not force me into it. I really like it! I like to challenge myself in my strength, see what food can do for a session and in the beginning I liked the esthetic part of it.

At the end of 2016 I chose to leave boxing behind and strength training, because my body could not handle that impact. I am very delicate when it comes to training pressure, I always had that. My mom said that to me way back (something in the family), but I brushed that off. Eventually it did had impact on my menstrual cycle and I lost it. To regain it back again, I did not do any form of exercise for 2,5 years straight, except walking (and some other stuff, that will be available in the E-book about periods). In the summer of 2019 I chose to begin with strength training again after studying to be a NSCA personal trainer. I already had my period for 1,5 years back again. This is a big story, but to keep it short. I already lost it for four years before getting it back. And I lost it, because of high training volumes and changing my food up. Not really because of my weight (in the beginning).

Because of muscle memory, I was able to gain strength relatively quick. The same for muscle gain. I could achieve this with two times a week to the gym and doing full body workouts. Aiming for a hypertrophy range. Sometimes it was three times a week, but I saw my menstrual cycle going bad again. It became lighter, was not on time etc. So I stuck to two times a week.

And then came corona. I hate training @home. I tried it for two times, than during lunges my knee started to hurt insane (took 6 months eventually to go away) and I made the decision to walk again right there. Walking has been my exercise for the past 4 years and I love it more than strength training, simply because it is more practical. I can do it pretty much anywhere. But what happened with my body after stopping with strength training?

Well, the following:

  • less endurance
  • muscle loss (check the photo, I think from the 4 kg’s I lost, at least 1 kg was muscle)
  • back became less wider
  • skin became less tighter
  • strength loss
  • less formed ass

But what did I gained?

  • I got my chest back ( strength training really reduces your breast)
  • I lost weight, I could never do that with weight training (body can crave a lot of food after weight training, mine does)
  • My hormones balanced out (period is regular again and not light)
  • My body is manageable and I am more comfortable in it than with strength training
  • I do not need to time my food around training
  • I look more fit and leaner.

I value the second list more. I like to be not restricted to one sport. I do what feels good. Maybe it will not only be walking next year, but with swimming, strength training or hockey. I did strength training, because I like the strength. But there was a time I did it for the aesthetics. And for the peeps that are reading this and are doing it for this reason, don’t. You do not want to be dependent from a sport for your looks. Never go and do something, because you are not happy with how you look and you want to change yourself. It’s your mindset, not your body you need to change. Or be afraid to loss your gains, sports should be for fun and for challenging yourself. Not for you getting paranoid, because you skipped the gym for a few days and muscle loss is kicking in…..

Think about that. Especially the ladies, because we cannot build that much muscle in comparison with men.

Much love,


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How your tastebuds changes when you eat low fat?

Low fat foods, high volume foods and low calorie drinks. All of them taste like heaven when you are dieting down or eating way to less! But when you start eating enough again it taste so dirty…How is that possible?

Well your body is smart, let’s start with that. Just like your metabolism adapts to your calorie intake and becomes lower when you eat less. It can becomes a bit faster when you eat more. The same goes for your tastebuds. They adapt to what is given. If you are used to a lot of salt, your tastebuds expect that. The moment you use less salt, they recognize it and than you add a bit more.

However, you can change the preference and adjust your tastebuds. For example, overtime using less salt makes your tastebuds adapt to it. The same goes with liking low calorie foods. If you go from semi fat milk to low fat milk, you can slowely adapt to that. This is kinda chill, when you are cutting down. Because of the calorie deflict you taste everything better, because again your body is adapting to getting less food. So it makes everything taste more intenser.

This however also has a downside. When in a deep cuttingfase or having an eatingdisorder, these low calorie foods mimic the volume for the stomach capacity, but not the macro- en micronutrients. Keep that in account the next time you think low calorie or low fat foods are healthy. They have a place in a diet, but not for all meal moments

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If you think therapy will have all the answers…

Hello readers,

Therapy is something a lot of people with an eating disorder either fear, look up to or do not take serious at all. For all of those people this article could be helpful. I have some sentences that I will put into this article from a lady I spoke to on Instagram. That went crazy quick and I am thankful that people read these!

What’s in it for you?

Depending on how you look at it. It either is very helpful or not at all. ‘When I first went to therapy, they (GP and dietitian) told me that talking about it would help and speed up the proces’. Therapy and talking about your thoughts should help and  yes it’s very nerve wrecking to talk about all the dark thoughts going on in your head, but you will feel relieved. It does depends how you ‘walk into therapy’. A lot of women and men with an eating disorder are often dishonest about either their foodintake or on how hard they work on the assignments they get from the therapist.

And I get that. There is so much going on and you know deep down it’s not oke what you are doing to yourself. The funny thing is, saying it out loud is actually the first steps to recovery. The shame you feel from talking about it is recovery. Having insight in these thoughts is recovery.

I always thought and I still believe; that working without judgement with a person suffering from an eating disorder is key. But sometimes it helps to be a bit judgy, because some people do get insight that the behavior is not something you should be proud of or is even harmful.

Your mindset stepping into therapy.

Wauw! The amount of people who walk into therapy not taking it serious or the amount of people who thinks it’s gonna ‘cure’ them is so big. And you know what, both are wrong. I highly advice you to go there with an open mind and blank thoughts.

Does this person really have the answers?

Well no, not one single helper in your journey will have all the answers. They do however have tips & tricks and I highly advice you to listen to them and use them in everyday life. How sooner you say yes to recovery, how sooner this will ends.

Much love,


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How to survive the lock-down when having an eating disorder?

Hello readers,

When having an eating disorder and depending in which state it is, it can be that you feel a bit disconnected from the whole corona situation. You don’t want to stay inside, but you want to move. Either in the gym or the park. When having binges or bulimia, you are maybe questioning if you financially can handle another binge episode and if it’s the right choice to go to the supermarket this time. Maybe even your pessimistic side of wishing yourself dead just came a little bit too near this time…

Having an eating disorder is already a form of lock-down if you ask me. By restricting yourself from social events and certain foods it’s already a big punishment to give yourself. So how do you cope with that dreadful anxiety you feel at the moment?

Keep prepping your meals / or follow your meal plan

If you have a structured routine of prepping your meal for the days or are following a plan from a dietitian, please stick to this! Remember your goal(s). Why did you choose for recovery? And stay realistic; your body still needs food every single day… period.

Do not go into your room and sneaky workout!

I am afraid a lot you all are already do this…  (-_-) Don’t lie to the people who love you and don’t feed into the anxiety you feel. If you want to move, I highly recommend that you move with somebody and make it a 30-45 min workout inside. Don’t go on for hours and hours!

Seek online help!

Depending in which country you are, you can chat online with fellow strugglers. In the Netherlands we have An online platform were they have a forum or an online chat (from 19:00-21:00) daily. You are not alone, how cliché it may sound.

Keep busy or sit down and listen.

For bingers or people who have bulimia tendencies, it can be very hard to fight the urges. You often get the advice to keep yourself distracted. In this case you can watch a movie at home, read a book, talk to someone (by phone or face-to-face). But sometimes if you want to fight the ED, you can stop and just listen to the chatter from your brain. Sometimes you just gotta sit down hear the bullsh*t your ED is telling you.

Keep setting goals for recovery 

Even in lock-down, you can always keep setting goals for recovery. Try some peanut butter on bread, eat your favorite candy or try to eat with your family.

Ask help with the pantry

If you want to binge badly, ask someone at home to put a lock on the pantry or ask the person to go with you when you are taking something from it.

I hope this helped! I never really wrote about this in the past, but I believe writing about this is vital. Even when it helps just one person <3